Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Ugh.


The life & times of an English major.
Was definitely having blog withdrawl today, for whatever reason.
Maybe it was because I didn't know what the fuck was going on in my English class. My professor is a cellphone nazi & because I forgot to put my watch on this morning, I had to guess what time it was for 50 mins.
Never in my life have I been subjected to such a shitty English class.
That may sound kind of silly to anyone else, but I'm a hardcore English nerd.
I can't remember the last time I didn't ace an English class.
Now I'm in this bullshit short story class & none of the stories speak to me, therefore, I have no interest in the fucking class.
I had to leave class early last week because I had...cramps.
Like murderous fucking cramps.
Not only did the professor mark me off as if I wasn't there at all that day, she acts like she has something against me now.
I realy can't be bothered.
I think I'm gonna go see my advisor tomorrow about dropping the class.

Other than that, all's been pretty quiet on the Western Front.
I'm beyond sick of waking up at 6 three days a week & 7 two days a week.
I'm tired of driving to a different city every morning.
I'm tired of being tired.
...& this is just the beginning.

Looking foreward to Thanksgiving when I'll get some time off & alone.
Until then, I guess I gotta keep on keepin' on.
Time for bed.
Goodnight. <3

Random Daily Haiku:

Maybe this is it.
Maybe this is all there is
& we're stuck waiting.

Sunday, September 11, 2011

Hey...


It's been 10 years, & amongst the many things I really remember about September 11th, 2001 is the ugly-ass blue turtle neck & khaki pants I was wearing that day.
I had never even heard of the Twin Towers before then.
I think a lot of people would like to take this day to sit & dwell on all of the horrible things that happened 10 years ago today, but that's just not the route I'm taking.
My heart goes out to every single person affected by the attacks & you best believe it affected me & my life, but I don't think taking time out to feel shitty about a shitty situation makes anything any better.
If anything, we should all feel fortunate to still be alive...& we should feel that way every day, not just one day of the year.
God bless everyone who lost their life that day.
That's all I'ma say about that.

Anyway, this semester, so far, is much different from the last two.
Not in a bad way, but definitely not in a good way.
I have wayyy too much work in all of my classes & there are very few cute boys in any of them.
There is, however, one guy in my math class who resembles Poetry Boy almost to a T.
It's too early to tell...well, anything about him other than the way he looks, but if he turns out cool, he might get his own alias & more spots on this site.

On the subject of my ex-almost-flames, Poetry Boy & DisasterCrush1, I think it's safe to start calling DisasterCrush1, DisasterCrush.
Let's face it, DisasterCrush2 was beyond a disaster & he fell out of my life almost as quickly as he crashed in.
I haven't given much thought to Poetry Boy in a long time.
I used to feel really down about the fact he moved back to where he was from, hours away from here, but when he moved, it's like he became another person.
Maybe he just went back to being who he was.
Then, who the fuck did I know? Ugh.
I guess, it's good knowing that he's alright.
Whatever.
Same goes for DisasterCrush.
Let's just say, he's not from New York...or North America & he went back to his country over the summer.
I don't know if he's ever coming back, but it won't really matter.
I spend a lot of time waiting for him to delete me from his friends on Facebook.
Who doesn't delete someone they barely knew, even after moving to another fucking continent?
This guy apparently.
On top of that, he's too nice of a guy to do something like that &, again let's face it, I never really mattered that much to him in the first place.
I can accept that now (without crying).
Recently realized DisasterCrush looks a lot like Fabrizio Moretti of The Strokes.
Maybe that helps you get a better idea.

Anyway, I'm listening to an hour-long Oveous Maximus set & I gotta get up early tomorrow, so I better get going.
No one ever "stays" at the college I go to.
People come & go with every semester.
Some poeple have been there for years & years on end.
& some, like DisasterCrush & Poetry Boy, spend 4 months there & are never heard from again.
Maybe this isn't the best place to find anyone but yourself.
I guess college isn't always about the opposite sex, but shit, that's all you ever think about while you're there.
My brother called tonight & asked me if I've been out lately, hanging with friends or anything & i can't tell you how tired I am of my relatives asking me that question.
I'm in a one-horse town & I DON'T PARTY.
Everyone I used to know likes to drink & drug & watch Jersey Shore & fuck each other.
I just can't do any of that.
The only person my age I know who felt the same way was Poetry Boy.
I guess it's rare to be an adult when you become an adult.
...Rambling again.

The reason I decided to post tonight was because I'm slowly starting to let go of the two people that have almost dominated this site.
It's been a full year since I started classes with Poetry Boy & over 6 months since DisasterCrush.
Now they're both gone & I'm still constantly talking about them.
It's nice to have some sort of dream to hold on to when you're bored or lonely & that's kind of the purpose they served to me.
Those times have passed & I need to start looking forward to the future.
What the future is, I have no idea, but I know it has nothing to do with this 22 page "short" story I'm reading for homework tonight.
I better get my ass in the bed.
I bought City & Colour's new album, "Little Hell", last night & I passed out in the halfway through it.
Here's to the even more amazing second half.
Goodnight. <3 br="br">