Thursday, September 30, 2010

Some SERIOUS Dallas Green therapy is in order tonight.

Goodnight. <3

Yes, my nails are disgustingly short now. They broke off from working at my job where all I did was zip, button & fold jeans. It was hangnail paradise.
I did, however, snag 4 mini bottles of OPI nail polish today for...$1!
As you may or may not know, I'm OBSESSED with my nails.
I paint them about twice a week (or more if the polish starts chipping early, so having short nails as opposed to nails so long, they look fake, is a huge bummer.
I've been doing all kinds of crazy shit to get the strength back into my nails but it's kind of like watching grass grow.
I'm gonna do a polish count tonight & I'll get back to you tomorrow with some pics (cause I know you care).
The only reason I feel licensed to bitch about shit like this is because I'm a girl.
I just my 10 best buddies back =(

Irrelevant & a bit creepy but,

I could stare at this picture all day. This dude is too perfect. I hope someone else took this shot & he is completely oblivious to how cute he is.

This video just made my life.
I don't have to get up until...
well, I have to be off my ass & on the highway by 11:15 to make my 12:00 class.
Not really looking forward to driving out there, especially if it's raining but I guess it's whatever.
I've been doing pretty well in school thus far (& exceptional compared to last year).
I'm just trying to get my shit done & cut the laziness a much as possible.
So stoked about seeing Asher Roth in 2 days.
Maybe that will recharge me a bit.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

I spent a huge portion of my high school existance "in love" with the same dude.
His name was Mark. A musician/photographer/everything I wanted to be all wrapped up in one guy & conveniently placed in the grade above me.
To this day, he's never once looked in my direction & sometimes it bothers me to think of how much thought & effort I put into trying to be worthy of his attention when I went home every day feeling even worse about myself.
None of this is Mark's fault.
He had the prettiest girlfriend in the world, he was friends with some of my favorite bands, & everyone at school knew his name.
Why I ever thought he would notice an asocial, often disheveled (I got up at 5 a.m. in high school), girl in the grade below, even for a second, is beyond me at this point.
Let's get one thing straight here: I STILL LIKE THIS GUY.
Don't think just because I've recognized the flaws in this one-sided relationship & talk about it openly, I've totally & completely moved on from this irritating, 5 year crush.
I think I've just come to the conclusion that some things are meant to happen & some aren't.
Some people are clearly meant to be together & some even more clearly are not.
It seems that everything I've ever wanted to do or be, he beats me to it in a heartbeat.
I often think I'm more frustrated about the whole situation than anything else.

Here's the kinda awesome part though:
There's a guy in one of my classes (can't give out names, just yet) & he's the sweetest kid in the fucking world.
I wouldn't say I feel the same way about him as I used to Mark, but he's got a fighting chance.
Best part?
I think this one might actually like me.
Even better part?
I don't even have to try.
Now, I know I may be jumping the gun here, some people are just SUPER friendly.
But...I'm hoping.
He's got this amazing awkwardness about him &, bonus, he's gorgeous.
I'm really not sure what I want to happen here.
I've litterally never been in this kind of situation before, but as much as it scares the fucking shit out of me, maybe it'll only be good things.

The whole point of this post was to explain that I've learned, you can't plan love out. I'm certainly not in love with this dude in my class but I certainly wasn't in love with Mark regardless of what my former self will tell you.
The reason Mark liked his pretty girlfriend was because she was pretty to him just by being herself. When you don't act like yourself just to get someone to like you, they either reject you & or fall in love with someone who isn't the real you.
If you like someone who doesn't seem to give a flying fuck about you, GIVE IT UP.
Someone out there is going to notice & absolutely adore you for exactly who you are.

And that's how the world's longest, sappiest story ended...

Two videos tonight, I'm feelin' lazy.

I want to marry this guy... No, really.

This band means the world to me. It makes me sad to think I'll never see them again, but I feel so lucky to have at least seen them once before they went their separate ways.I love my New York boys.

Oh &, not that it matters or anything but...

I'm going to see the 3 sexiest, funniest, most amazing guys on Saturday.
Hate on, bitches.

I need to

resist the urge to post things, that are possibly going to get me in trouble, on here.
I just the greatest fucking idea...
but, just in case someone looks at this,
I can't say anything about it.

Uh, No

I ordered this epilator online abouty a month ago & not only was it the most ridiculous run-around of my entire life, but I think it might be a little too much for me to handle.
For those who don't know, an epilator is a hair removal device that supplies numerous tweezers (this one, I believe, has 75). When you turn it on, the tweezers spin & rip the hair out from the root.
Yes, it's just as painful as it sounds.
I pride myself on having a pretty high pain tolerance, so I didn't really think twice before buying.
Bad move.
In some places it feels like a tickle, some it feels like a burn, & others feel like a thousand needles.
I'd heard that this was the least painful epilator (& based on the price, it better be), I can't even begin to imagine what the most painful feel like.
Note: I've only used this on my legs
My ankle is still burning from a place I went over about a half hour ago.
I don't know why I'm talking about this, but, fuck.
Impulse buying is not cute.

Monday, September 27, 2010

I'm supposed to be in bed now,

but thanks to that nap, I'm wide awake.
Oh well.

Tru Fax:

I need a hat like this. =)

Even after my long-ass rant about marriage at nineteen, I'd still consider marrying Billy Rymer.
This dude seems like the greatest guy alive, he's one of my New York boys, & he is, hands down, one of the best drummers alive.
I think those are two extremely valid reasons to marry him.
All jokes aside, he seems like the kind of person you could walk right up to, start a conversation about anything, & not have it end awkwardly.

First Facebook-worthy photo in a long while.
Yes, it's dark & cropped,
but my living room has dim lighting...& it's a fucking mess.
My hair is growing out like crazy, even though it doesn't look very long in the picture.
I'm hoping next time I get my hair done (which is preferably soon), my girl doesn't get scissor-happy & chop all this Hell I call hair, off.
By the time winter comes, who knows what my hair will look like.
I'm just trying to hold on to what I got for now.

Speaking of college, I've also learned that some people just never grow up.
You hear people say that all the time, but it's really true.
The most immature people are the ones who believe they're the most responsible human beings on Earth.
I don't know why anyone would want to get engaged in college, let alone get married.
Especilly if you haven't lived together prior to the engagement.
Once you're married & move in with each other, you're gonna learn that he jerks off on the toilet & he's gonna find out you put tampons in your nose when you get nosebleeds.
If you can still accept each other after that, congrats. If you can't, you're fucked now.
All I'm saying is to give yourself some time.
To speak for myself, at this age I'm still figuring out who the fuck I really am.
Someone can't love you if you don't know who you are.
The girls I'm referring to here have ever-changing personalities that tend to flucuate with the changing of the weather.
I just don't understand it.
At this point in my life, any perfect guy in the world (even that certain someone in my Poetry class) could propose to me & it would have to be a "no".
Under no circumstance does anyone need to get married at the sweet, sweet age of nineteen.
In my opinion, getting married then growing up is not the correct order of things.
Maybe the whole situation is none of my concern but with networks like Facebook, it's hard to log in without finding out that so-&-so 'just finished having sex'.
If anything, I wish people would kindly leave me out of their business.

High school's over & you still won't quit.
-If You See Jordan, Something Corporate


College is fucking crazy.
Between drving 25 minutes to get there, to trying to find a parking space, to power-walking to my classes, I'm definitley feeling like I'm actually in school again.
With all of it's craziness, I really appreciate being at this school.
Compared to my last college, this is the heaven above heaven.
I feel so unbelievably lucky to be here...
& there are the most incredible guys walking around campus every second of every day.
Again, so amazing compared to my 90% female prior college.
I'd forgotten what the male species was supposed to look like.
Can't say I don't have my eye set on a few in particular but I'm pretty superstious so let's not jinx my chances here.
Let's just say, I'm stoked to go to my Poetry class tomorrow & see a certain someone.
I say it all the time (or maybe I don't) but I'm gonna try to write more on here.
Don't think I've thrown the towel in before the fight even started.